Monday, November 19, 2012

I'm tired.

I'm so incredibly tired that I lack of words to describe it. I'm exhausted of facts, dates, running club, being socially active.

I'm so incredibly tired, but at the same time I'm incredibly happy. I've rarely encountered a feeling like this, but I like to think that I've found a sort of internal sort of happiness. Do our feelings make our thoughts or do our thoughts create our feelings? I prefer to believe that our feelings and surroundings create our thoughts. I've been surrounded with some horrible people recently... the ones that are horrible according to my definition, people whose only way of feeling good is making everyone(and I mean EVERYONE) feel bad. I'm sorry if you feel touched by this talk, but the moment you affect my friends, it affects me and it's just stupid what you are unconsciously trying to achieve.
I'm just bored of boring people... On the other hand, I've developed a skill to just block them out. It's even sort of nice to see how defenceless they are when they realise that they have absolutely no power over you. I concentrate on the people who are important to me and actually matter. I've also been surrounded my people who love me. I'm so lucky to have many of them.

I'm still tired.

I'm so so tired that my head is completely blank and I'm sure that I'm gonna spend the night sleep-talking about re-assurance treaty and Kaiser Wilhelm and Alexander II and basically everything... But in the end it doesn't even matter as the exams will be over in a weeks time and I'm getting ready to spend the weekend in London!! After that I'm gonna go back home and fly to Kenya!!! If the endless tiredness keeps dragging me down, I try to remind myself that it's soon gonna be over......for a short period of time, but it's simply going to be amaziiiiing. There's always something to look forward to. ok, I'm probably just in my little bubble of happiness at the moment. The amazing combination of tiredness and happiness. I better go to bed now as I'm using my blog as a place for procrastination at the moment and it's not doing anything good before exams.

Wish me good luck!!!!!!!!!!!! :)


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